In answer to your first question about being “enthusiastically-hard-to-get” I hope this helps: “Play hard-to-get.” is my way of saying don’t give your time away to clients that can’t afford to spend money on you (if you have bills to pay). However, in cases where you know you are dealing with a person who can afford you (or if you can do without a fee), I advise “Don’t wait for folks to contact you. Show you’re enthusiastic about helping them.” In other words, enthusiastically pursue clients who have money. Sadly, that took me quite some time to figure out!

Your second question was : “Which do you think is more important: creating an idea of who I am and what my business is or authenticity?” I love this question because I think we are all trying to “create an idea of who we are” and in our striving to be our very best we sometimes try to act as if we are that new and improved version of ourselves. Trouble is , it doesn’t work. When I was in my initial stages of my coaching biz, I had adopted a fake “totally together life-coach” persona with an artificial voice to match. When my kids heard me coaching they would ask “Why do you talk like that?”. I found being phony not only alienating to my offspring but also difficult and tiresome. I do not recommend it.

Naturally, you must have an idea of “what your business is” and be able to articulate that in a way that “wows “your would-be clients… the trick to growing a biz is to discover and eloquently express “your magic”, that is to say, what you do differently and better than anyone else…otherwise why should (or could) anyone choose to work with you?

From your final question, it sounds like you need to identify how your clients hear about you- how exactly it is that they “come out of the dark and appear suddenly”. Are they are responding to referrals or to some other form of marketing? Identify what’s working now and see if you can refine and ramp up your efforts in that area. Solve the mystery of their “sudden” appearance and work it. I think that’s a better plan than lurking about in dark places and waiting .

Forgive me I am can unload words rather quickly.

In this article you say, “Don’t wait for folks to contact you. Show you’re enthusiastic about helping them.”

In a more recent article titled How to Get More Customers than You Want you say, ““Play hard to get.””

It sounds like you are suggesting I be enthusiastically-hard-to-get and that confuses me.

How would you suggest I balance enthusiasm and not be too available?

and

Which do you think is more important: creating an idea of who I am and what my business is or authenticity.

With my limited experience I cannot identify where my clients come from. It seems as if my best clients come out of the dark and appear suddenly. When I am not even looking for them. How do you think I can go about making that happen more often.